It was 1998, I laid wide awake and a tune played over and over....
I could have SWORN that little geek was saying:
Amber Aggona, I didn't know
that we still haven't walked in the glow of each others majestic presence.
Listen Amber and hear my words,
They're the ones I would think if there was a me, before you
Which isn't a far cry from:
Ana Ng and I are getting old
And we still haven't walked in the glow of each other's majestic presence
Listen Ana hear my words
They're the ones you would think I would say if there was a me for you
Any which way, it also goes well with
"aGGona, I know this world is killing you"
In regards to a real surname,
I was the last grand kid with my Grandfathers last name.
After my mother left with me from our hometown of Cincinnati, I felt disconnected from that huge family. She remarried, and got a new last name and left me with the maiden.
In the back of my head, I was always a bit pissed for having a different last name as my mother. It was a separation feeling, it pained me, but would have been trivial to her, had I mentioned it.
Had I lived in Cincinnati and had the same last name as my giant family of aunts and uncles and cousins, I would have felt a belonging. No, I was raised in a house with 3 souls,all bearing different surnames.
In my heart, I feel alone, in my past family surname context.
I have none, but the one I misheard, that lonely night in 1998,
just me & the Johns, and those crazy lyrics.
May 3rd, 2015
I stood and listened, while John & John sung to me, with my love's arms wrapped around me,
and it all came full circle.
June 2018
Was it all enough?
